R  A  L  P H
  The Review of Arts, Literature, Philosophy and the Humanities

Number 118

Early Late Summer 2004

The Good Cripple,
Advanced Rut Hunting, and
Henry Sidgwick and Utilitarianism

Patagonia: Land of Giants
"Once there, there is
little to do except buy
the T-Shirt and a plastic penguin,
and then turn around and
go back from whence they
think they might have come."

Lucien Hervé: Building Images
"Between the two of them,
Le Corbusier and Hervé managed to cast
a pall over life and cities and the modern soul ---
a pall that, unfortunately,
some still think of as high art."

"Rats spend most of their time
eating, sleeping, and making babies.
One pair can produce 15,000 descendants.
They usually stay within
sixty-five feet of their nests.
When a colony is poisoned, the pregnancy rate
of any nearby female rat doubles."

Great Reviews of the Past
Location of the Soul
"Sometimes Selzer, like Shakespeare,
gets so caught up in his words
that you want to grab him
and take a scalpel to his prose,
cut some of those colorful tumors away."

George Rodger's
Photography, 1908 - 1995, and
Do-It-Yourself Coffins

A Love Poem for Father?
Who are you trying to kid?
A Critique of Unidentified Book Review
Concerning Unnamed Books

Ed Zern,
Eternal Treblinka,
A Round-Heeled Woman,
George Bush and the Civil War

Bonehead English
Part I

"These were the boneheads, right?
Yet with a couple of exceptions their stories were
fun, or funny, or sad --- and in a couple of cases,
downright gripping."

Part II
"I loved the class
and came to love my students.
Most of them told me their stories without shame.
I remember thinking how lucky I was
to discover their wonderful awful secrets
while pretending to teach them English."

Pack My Bag
"It was here,
on these Sundays,
I began to have
those first movements of delight,
those first motions toward
the open heart which is growing up,
taking one's place,
looking beauty
right in her cow eyes."

A Snatch of "The Miller's Tale"
[Middle English Version]
"He felte a thyng al rough and long yherd,
And seyde, "Fy! allas! what have I do?"
"Tehee!" quod she, and clapte the wyndow to,
And Absolon gooth forth a sory pas.
"A berd! a berd!" quod hende Nicholas,
"By Goddes corpus, this goth faire and weel."
Another Snatch of "The Miller's Tale"
[Modern English Version]
"He felt this rough and long-haired thing
And said, "O damn! what have I done?"
"Tee hee!" says Alison and slams the window shut.
Absolon goes forth on his sad way.
"A beard! A beard!" he says.

Two by Lloyd C. Pettus
The End, The End
"And so, you and I Jesus are assigned the task
To be the last of the caring Jews, pulling
Babes from their graves by dawn
(They've told us we can have them all).
We'll leave at sunrise, moving carefully
About the edges of the falling cross-beams,
Retrieving the babes from their graves."

The Last of the Douchebag Warriors
"The Douchebag Warrior was taken by his mother
To join with the pilgrims
Marching the shore of the River Jordan.
There, he was told, he would find a drunken penitent
Waiting at the Cafe Golgotha
Waiting to share his vision of eternity."


A complete list of all books reviewed in RALPH,
arranged by title, including author, subject, and publisher,
plus a listing of all readings, articles and poems
that have appeared since 1994.

of our most notorious reviews
as collected in the hard-copy

Help perpetuate honest, noisy, pesky book reviews.
With your $25 subscription, you get
a free copy of one or more of the titles from
Mho & Mho Works

T H E  F A C T S
Submitting Books
The best way to get books to RALPH for review.
Submitting Reviews
Suggestions for would-be reviewers --- and payment schedule.
RALPH didn't spring full-blown from the brows of the gods:
     We've been around (in different guises) for over thirty years.     
The Fessenden Fund
Describing the good works of RALPH's official godparent

Lolita Lark, Editor-In-Chief
Post Office Box 16719
San Diego CA 92176


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